November 19, 2003
| Koppelgram! >>
Quantum Iraq
Sure, sure, we journalists talk a good game about the importance of engaging stories and evocative pictures… but come on, people really just want more contests!
Nicholas Kristof is soliciting better names for last spring’s war in Iraq. He writes: “I’ll report the top five suggestions and give those writers Iraqi 250-dinar notes with Saddam’s portrait.”
Here’s my entry: Saddam Entanglement. It’s like quantum entanglement, get it? That’s when two particles mysteriously affect one another even when separated by a huge distance (the 6,000 miles from Washington to Baghdad, say). Wikipedia says: “Einstein famously derided entanglement as ‘spooky action at a distance.’”
Hmm, maybe I should have made Spooky Action at a Distance my backup entry…
Anyway, Saddam Entanglement is also apt because let’s face it, quantum physics is almost — almost — as confusing as the situation in Iraq right now.

File under: Gleeful Miscellany, Journalism
Comments
My favorite choice is still "Desert W. Storm."
How about the First Pre-emptive War?
Desert W. Storm! Hilarious! Did you make that up? You didn't make that up. If you made that up, you win one Snarkpoint. But I don't think you did, therefore you LOSE one Snarkpoint.
First Pre-emptive War sounds like something out of an Asimov novel, doesn't it?
A quick Google search would indicate that I did not, in fact, make that up. I first read it on MetaFilter.
And even after extensive reflection, I can produce nothing better. The Pre-emptoponnesian War just doesn't have a ring.
Also, seeing as how we are equal powers on this website, I'm giving myself two Snarkpoints.
Good thing, because you start with -14.
(Ah, the level of discourse on our blog so far is everything I dreamed it would be!)
I detect irony in your last sentence, Robin.
I give myself infinity^100 Snarkpoints, steal your soul, and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000. Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
Another quantum entanglement page (illustrated, lots of examples, no math) can be found at:
http://www.joot.com/dave/writings/articles/entanglement/