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April 21, 2005

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Banana Refuglic

Cross-posted from the Beehive, ‘cause I’m just that lame, sorry.

Tucked into The Fresno Bee’s wire feed is this nugget — The Gap will be opening a new chain targeted to boomer women, called … wait for it … “Forth & Towne.”

From the press release:

“We created an address with the name ‘Forth & Towne,’ because we wanted it to evoke a sense of place — to signify a special and unique shopping destination,” explained Gary Muto President, Forth & Towne. “‘Forth’ references our fourth brand, and ‘Towne’ conveys a sense of community that we want to create for our customers when they shop with us.”

Would it be snarky to point out that they misspelled both “fourth” and “town”? I’m sure they’ll correct that oversight by the store’s fall launch.

“Fitting rooms will be at the center of the store, with ‘neighborhoods’ of merchandise around them,” Gap CEO and President Paul Pressler told the AP.

Oh! Cu-ute! So the checkout counter will be sort of like ‘City Hall,’ and the sales racks will be the ‘crack slums,’ right? And instead of mopping the store, it’ll be like ‘neighborhood beautification’ or whatever. I can’t wait to shop there. Oh wait, I’m not a boomer woman. Totally forgot. Just over-enthusiastic.

In addition: Steve at the other snark blog points out that the F&T ampersand just dodges what would be a very unfortunate acronym, given the store’s target demographic.

mthompson-sig.gif
Posted April 21, 2005 at 5:12 | Comments (10) | Permasnark
File under: Society/Culture

Comments

Oh Mattie. I do love you so. Why can't I be there in person to hear you rant about this topic. Just thinking about your enunciation of "cu-cute" makes me happy.

Where is there going to be a Forth and Coming Store? Wil there be one in San Diego? Is there someone at Forth and Towne I can speak with? Thank you.

Posted by: Abby on May 3, 2005 at 03:08 PM

For your information, they mean forth as in one, second,third, forth.....So that means is corect. FORTH!!So who is the dumbass now?!?!?!

Posted by: Jerrry on May 6, 2005 at 10:19 PM

^ Current leading candidate for favorite Snarkomment.

Is the post above me for real?! It is first, second, third, FOURTH, you dumbass. It's not correct. Next time check your facts in the dictionary before you flame.

Posted by: Lauren on May 20, 2005 at 11:41 AM

Go FORTH to the TOWNE of GAP in the REPUBLIC OF BANANNA. We need a new shopping concept like we need a hole in the head. Those little fingers in China are all going to be very busy. Whatever happened to good ole' Union Made in the USA?

Posted by: Monica on August 23, 2005 at 02:56 PM

"Jerrry" from "OAL.com" is way hilarious. The sequence "one, second, third" is truly inspired. I'm not sure why he went with the formal "!!" and "?!?!?!" though, and not the more vernacular "!!!1111!1!!". :)

Off topic, but cannot believe both gap.com and oldnavy.com are "temporarily closed" "to bring you a better shopping experience". Do they not know it is back to school time? Do they expect me to haul my 3 little ones into a store? Lands End and LL Bean are getting my shopping $ today.

Posted by: Carolyn on August 25, 2005 at 07:45 AM

I've always been curious abt the stats -- I'm sure these companies know them -- re: how much money they lose for, like, every SECOND of downtime. For Amazon.com I'm sure it's massive.

Forth and Towne is opening in Chicago (2 stores) and I believe Boston.

Posted by: Becca on August 26, 2005 at 09:47 AM
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