The murmur of the snarkmatrix…

August § The Common Test / 2016-02-16 21:04:46
Robin § Unforgotten / 2016-01-08 21:19:16
MsFitNZ § Towards A Theory of Secondary Literacy / 2015-11-03 21:23:21
Jon Schultz § Bless the toolmakers / 2015-05-04 18:39:56
Jon Schultz § Bless the toolmakers / 2015-05-04 16:32:50
Matt § A leaky rocketship / 2014-11-05 01:49:12
Greg Linch § A leaky rocketship / 2014-11-04 18:05:52
Robin § A leaky rocketship / 2014-11-04 05:11:02
P. Renaud § A leaky rocketship / 2014-11-04 04:13:09
Jay H § Matching cuts / 2014-10-02 02:41:13

Pimpin Large
 / 

Clive Thompson recently discovered a crazy light-up watch and linked to it. I checked it out, and what caught my eye wasn’t the flashy blue LEDs; it was the promotional copy:

Now what really makes this watch stand out, is the light up feature, the watch lights up every light in a spiral and then off in a spiral every 2 minutes. Super flashy and you will be Pimpin large. Pimpin was never easy till now. Grab one and see for yourself. There is nothing like it.

“Pimpin was never easy till now.” I love that. And I have a feeling it’s got legs. Let’s pull up a random piece of Land’s End apparel and try out our new catch-phrase, shall we?

Men’s Cashmere Vest

We use only top-grade white cashmere from the Kashmir goats raised in Inner Mongolia. Their downy undercoat hairs are the finest, strongest and most pure. We insist on using two-ply yarns, twisted just enough to add strength and prevent unsightly pilling (a process we’re continuously improving). It’s the best way to give you a plusher, more substantial sweater that lasts. Pimpin was never easy till now.

Success! And now, to prove the pimptastic power of this new all-purpose marketing slogan, let’s surf on over to JCPenney.com

Chandelier With Toile Shades in Blue or Black

An old favorite makes a triumphant return — toile is the home decorating must-have of the moment. Scrolling metal base with burnished bronze finish. Can be used with or without shades. 22″ H. 24″ diameter. 36″ chain. Uses five 60W bulbs, max. (not included). Some assembly required. Imported from China. Pimpin was never easy till now.

I think you see what I’m talking about. This thing is the penicillin of pimpology.

And, as a proponent of open source pimpware, I am making it immediately available in the public domain. Pimpin was never easy… till now.

March 12, 2004 / Uncategorized

One comment

ahahahah!

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